What if we didn’t?
I’ve built three companies I was deeply passionate about and they all were acquired. On paper, that seems like a clean success story, but it wasn’t. It wasn’t a shiny bright newly lit candle, beautifully glowing in the night - giving you a warm, cozy feeling. It was more like dumping old rotten food into a compost machine and turning it non-stop until your arms seized up. In the end you’re bone breaking tired. You made something to add to the world, but the process was messy and sometimes gross - you questioned if it was all worth it.
Nobody handed me a rulebook for any of it. I didn’t come from money, or a family full of founders, or a network that opened doors. Quite the opposite - I built my own map, one step at a time, mostly by getting it wrong first. I don’t have regrets, but I do have great lessons.
Here’s what I’ve learned, the hard way and enough times that I trust it now:
Don’t play nice. Play real. We’re told to stay likable, agreeable, non-threatening. Growth doesn’t come from shrinking. Take up space.
Don’t perform polish. Perform guts. We sand down our sharp edges to get a seat at the table. But the table’s rotten. Say the thing. Show up anyway.
Don’t fit the format. Rewrite the form. Professionalism is just a performance of norms built to exclude. Do it your way. Let it be weird, but most importantly, let it be you.
Don’t smooth the story. Show the scar. The world wants a sanitized, linear success arc. Real stories are messy, nonlinear, and full of power. Start before it’s perfect, because it never will be.
Don’t stay in bounds. Break the damn mold. The rules weren’t made for you — they were made to contain you. Step out. Own your out-of-bounds energy.
This newsletter is where I say the parts I used to leave out. Not because the more polished version was a lie, but because it was never the whole truth, and the whole truth is more useful to you than the highlight reel or a LinkedIn post. It will feel uncomfortable at times to share, but my goal is to dig deep into the truth and be okay in sharing it. More and more I’m looking at removing the momentum and instead slowing down enough to listen to my intuition. I’m learning how to be honest with myself on where the truth lies - not how I want to see it, but what it actually is.
If you’re building something and nobody handed you a map or a network either, you’re in the right place. I hope you join me on this journey and connect with it on a real level. Let’s break the mold, together.
In bad form,